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My Pete Campbell Fantasy Date

Meet Giles

Location: East Village, NYC.

Origin: Stockholm, Sweden.

Occupation: Philanthropist in Training.

Hobbies: Sex, collecting airline safety instruction cards, and Crossfit

How We Met: I was introduced to Giles and six other Swedes at Carnagie Hall.

Interesting Facts: Although Giles is straight, he has made out with more guys than me. In Sweden, Giles had a sex blog and studied Swedish Massage. Oh yeah— his family also put the “Goodman” in Bergdorf Goodman.

The Date

Intrigued by my dating column, Giles asked if he too could be objectified and take me out for a night. Normally I decline date proposals, but I decided to accept his challenge because he had a Pete Campbell allure about him (“Pete Campbell” bonus points) and I too was intrigued by his online “column.” We met at the fountain in Washington Square Park and took a leisurely stroll. Giles had a full agenda lined up for the evening. Our first destination was Robataya, a festive Japanese restaurant that serves your meal on enormous wooden paddles. I was so excited about the paddles and the promise land of photo opps they would provide, until we arrived and discovered that Robataya doesn’t allow photography (“Photo Restriction” deduction points). In their defense, flashing cameras are a distraction to the sushi chefs who are working with razor-sharp knives. I politely put down my camera—and a glass of Yamazaki—but not before quickly snagging a photo of me kissing a fish.

Kiss A Fish & Make A Wish

Gilesson

Hanging Tough

Well Suited for a Dive Bar

Giles was a bit camera shy but I had just the remedy for that. After dinner we headed to Death and Company for some choice cocktails and to get a little more comfortable. Unfortunately the bar was at capacity, so we needed a plan B. I thought it would be much more fun to have a drink in a total dump since we were all suited-up, so we ducked into a dive bar and ordered mixed drinks (instead of cocktails). The medicine worked almost immediately, as alcohol has a placebo effect. Giles became noticeably more relaxed with my camera —now we were getting somewhere. Being the great story teller he is, Giles shared with me epic tales about a Great-Great Uncle who had “business” with the likes of Fidel Castro and Che Guevara and about a distant cousin who married the crown of Spain. He recounted some wild adventures in Tully, Australia, where he had to choose between a river full of crocodiles or the belligerent locals who wanted to make him and his friends “Squeal like pigs.” So Dangerous…I was captivated.

Elegantly Polishing A Mixed Drink

On The Rocks

Bottoms Up


Later That Night

Things loosened up just in time for our Grand Finale at Casa Mezcal for a little burlesque night cap. By this point we had been walking from the West Village to the East Village and all over the Lower East Side. Normally I love to go for long walks but tonight I wore heels. Giles is considerably shorter than me so I wanted to tower over him by wearing the highest heels I could bear (“Bad Shoe” deduction points). By the time we arrived at Casa Mezcal I was done…walking at least. Giles found me the best seat available so I could relax and enjoy the show and brought me some wine to help alleviate my discomfort (“Chivalry” bonus points). Casa Mezcal was having an off-night as the performers were only so-so at best, but regardless it was still quite a scene of odd balls, suits and liberated tits. The bar was a little drafty so Giles offered me his ($4K) Jacket to keep warm (“Chivalry” bonus points). It was getting late, so we finished our wine, hopped into a cab and called it a night.

Giles & The Crocodiles

Hmmm

The Conclusion

Pros: Is a great story teller, has a Pete Campbell Seductiveness, and is wealthy.

Cons: Is younger, has a Pete Campbell Seductiveness, and is a Trust Fund Kid.

Giles comes from a long line of “Most Eligible Bachelors,” as he was bred to be a Gentlemen and is very experienced in the ways of the world. I am pretty sure his ancestors invented chivalry, because apparently his Great Great Grandfather also  invented Love Potion No. 9. Giles’ family is so interesting that there is even a documentary about them and their family business at Bergdorf Goodman. The list could go on and on. He owns so many bragging rights—yet Giles is modest, unpretentious and thoughtful. In addition to the fact that Giles has many tales to tell, he is also well-disciplined in the art of active listening (perhaps this why he is such a great storyteller). Although I’ve been charmed, Giles’ playboy legacy will supersede all other redeeming qualities that would make him a potential catch. However…he is hard to resist.

Nighty-Night.

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